Top 10 Worst Board Games Ever

For as long as man has existed, there have been board games. In fact, archaeologists now think that cavemen invented fire so that they could play backgammon late into the night. (Also, they would be able to use the fire to see if dinosaurs were heading towards their caves.)

Nowadays, board games are a fun way to pass the time if there is a power outage in your neighborhood and you can’t watch TV. They are great for children and also for college students who want to do something while pregamming before a night out (a case in which some rules might have to be modified to allow for alcohol consumption).

One example of a popular board game is Monopoly. Monopoly is so popular that Hasbro has made roughly 1,000,000 different versions of it. I do not like Monopoly (not even the SpongeBob version) because it takes too long to play and I have little patience. Also, people always play Monopoly with different rules and one person always takes the game way too seriously and another person always takes the game not seriously at all (me) and might even try to cheat and take extra fake money (me again). Despite this, after hours and hours of extensive research, I have determined that Monopoly is not one of the worst board games ever.

Top 10 New (Ridiculous) Products

My grandmother always has several different gossip magazines, newspaper clippings, cartoons, articles, etc., etc., in her purse that she can take out at a moment's notice to show you.  Recently, she showed me the Hammacher Schlemmer catalog, which I had never seen before.  This is actually very surprising since when I looked up the catalog on Wikipedia, I learned that it was founded in 1848-- the year of my birth.

What makes the catalog great is that it has even more ridiculous overpriced crap than those SkyMall catalogs on airplanes.  Here are the Top 10 Products for sale in the Hammacher Schlemmer catalog, or simply the Top 10 New Products, since there really can't be any products better than these.  And when I say "better", what I really mean is "worse".

Top 10 Coolest Talking Movie Dogs

There are four requirements you have to meet in order to be on this list.  You must be:

·      A dog

·      In a movie

·      Able to talk (remember, you must also be a dog)

·      Cool

I didn’t say making the Top 10 Coolest Talking Movie Dogs list was going to be easy!  Without further ado, here are the ten most awesome linguistically-gifted canines from the big screen.  (Please note: If your favorite movie talking dog didn’t make the cut, I don’t care.)

Jeffrey's Top 10 Inventions (That Need to be Made)

There seem to be new inventions popping up every single day.  That is because on most days at least one person in the world has invented something.  I know this is probably true because on most days I invent at least one amazing new invention.  However, since I am not handy, I cannot actually build these inventions (so they are really only great ideas).

Thomas Edison was such a good inventor that they named a town in New Jersey after him.

Here is a list of some of the greatest inventions in history:

• Fire (mankind’s first great invention)
• TV
• Remote Control
• Dog (humans invented dogs by breeding nice wolves—I saw a special about it on Animal Planet)
• Spaceships
• Spark Plugs
• Tires
• Jeggings
• Pillows
• Candles
• Paper (I know that this was invented in China)
• Funny Hats
• Time

Just kidding with that last one!  We didn’t invent time—it existed even before people did!  Someone did invent the clock though.

Many inventions are good, but some end up being bad.  With new technology comes more complex inventions and a possible robot revolt.  If you have ever watched Battlestar Galactica, you know that Cylons look and act like real people, but they really want to kill us.

Here’s a list of my Top 10 Inventions.  Since I have not actually created these products and do not own any patents for them, you can steal these ideas.  Actually, most of these things probably already exist and I just don’t know it.